Steve vs. the Fire Ants

My back yard is a nice one. There have been loads of hours put into the gardens and yard works and what not. Beside the house is a HUGE maple tree that provides shade to relax in on those hot sunny days. I hold my backyard dear to my heart. And when something dear to you gets threatened, a person can become savage. Or maybe it’s just me.

In the middle of the garden there is a stone path, and at the end of the path is a large rock. And under that rock is where the evil lies. A colony of Red Fire Ants, yes the biting kind. So the other day my foot was attacked yet again by those little bastards and I declared war.

I charged the rock and over turned it with only a slight pain in my back. Then I accidentally spilt gas on the raging inferno of angry piss ants. Suddenly a mysterious flaming newspaper fell from the heavens and ignited the fuel stained earth incinerating the ants like a nuke. However, those ants are tough like a fox and many somehow survived. They fled like refuges with all that they could carry. But the can of pesticides I found stopped that pretty quick.

I win.